Saturday Night

Another Saturday night and I ain't got nowhere to go.
Standard Saturday night:
The Girl has been to gymnastics and piano and since she got up at 6am she is tired and cranky, which makes me tired and cranky. I did manage to move a couple more boxes of books into storage and rearrange the girls bedroom, got rid of the last bit of the husbands wicker furniture. Wicker: if you aren't going to shove someone in it and set fire to it - what's it for?
I bundled her into bed having only brushed her teeth (bath smarth), a quick story and seeya later kiddo!
I microwaved a curry, poured a glass of wine and sat down to watch some telly.
So that's it. There you go.
I think I'll do some knitting, maybe watch a bit of Star Trek. Woo Hoo!! . Read more!

Bang

One of the few good things about living in Blandberra is that we can legally buy fireworks on the Queen's birthday weekend.

I gave the husband $50 and sent him out to score fireworks. Since this is (and it better be) our last Queens birthday long weekend in Blandberra, I thought we had better make the most of it.

He did exedingly well, and came home with a big pack of tubes of gunpowder. We later saw the same pack for sale (at Video Easy!!) for $85.

Traditional hotdogs were prepared with fried onions, jalepenos, cheese and tomato sauce (I know, it sounds gross, but it actually works) and the girl, the delinquent and I sat and watched the nervous husband lighting the firecrackers. Some shot up and exploded in the sky, some fizzed on the ground but most gave a variation of the fountain in the picture above. The smoke from the gunpowder was thick and I wondered how many people got pulled up at the airport for having explosives residue on their clothes that weekend.
The girl (dressed in her Goth gear for the night!!) spent most of the time hiding in her cubby exclaiming "tell me when it's safe to come out!". We coaxed her out with some sparklers and after her inital fear she was soon lighting her own sparklers from the fire. She even lit a (small) firecracker - with assistance. After each bang and shower of sparks we'd all go "YAY!!" or "WOO HOO" and applaude and try to act enthusiastic without being sarcastic - which was difficult since it was so cold and most of the crackers were pretty lame. We later discovered there was communal firework lighting going on in the park on the corner, but it would have involved socialising with the native Blandberrans, and we were happier with our exclusive backyard display. Rose, the Staffy, was close to a nervous breakdown by the time it was all over. She spends every Queen's Birthday weekend and every thunderstorm trembling and hiding under my skirt - bravery isn't her strongest character trait.
Bela, however, proved himself to be a brave and fierce guard dog when he accousted the plumber that came to fix the hot water service. We had to hold him back he was so intent on attacking the intruder. I was very proud and very worried at the same time. Puppy school starts this weekend, and not a minute too soon. How do you reassure a frantic dog that the man is permitted in the house and not here to steal the telly? I shall never be afraid to walk to the 7/11 at night again.

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No thanks

These are the plans we submitted, following is what the council want us to build.

It's boxy, ugly, boring and uninspired. I'm going to war. Read more!

Most of my neighbours are nice..

To whom it may concern,
I wish to address the concerns raised by my neighbours regarding the proposed first floor addition to my home.
The concern raised by R of W street is justified and I agree with her that our proposed balcony would give views into her backyard. As such, the balcony will be fully screened with a 1700mm high picket style fence. The pickets will be closely set together and all views from the balcony will be obscured.
In my opinion, the objections raised by the two other parties, Mr and Mrs G and Mr E, are totally unfounded and without merit.
While the majority of houses in Mc Street are single storey the street is surrounded by double storey buildings and apartment blocks. The first building in the street, although officially a V Street address, is much higher than our proposed first floor addition. There are also several apartment blocks and town houses in B Street which are clearly visible from Mc street and are also higher than our proposed first floor.While I concede that the first floor additions to number 5 and number 12 Mc street are lower than our proposed addition, I disagree that they are "barely visible" and in fact, are clearly visible.
I find it amusing that the objections that the proposed first floor addition is "not in keeping with the Neighbourhood Character" is then followed by an objection to our attempt to recreate a Victorian style which "mimics" the adjacent properties. Our intention is for the extension to look as original as possible in order to maintain the neighbourhood character of the Victorian houses that dominate the area.
The G's claim that our first floor addition will be a "permanent obstruction to the skyline while standing in Mc street". While this is true, I would like to point out that the only skyline feature visible from Mc street are the L Street high rise housing estate buildings. Richmond is an inner city suburb with high density living - an uninterrupted view of the horizon is not possible.

Our proposed first floor is situated as close to the front of the house as possible in order to maximise our living space. The "design benefit" we gain from having a gabled roof is to allow for vaulted ceilings on the first floor which create a larger area that can be utilised by my family. Space and living area was one of our priorities in the design of the extension. Our foremost priority was to create a Victorian looking extension that will blend seamlessly with the existing house, not appear to have been "stuck on" as the extension at number 12 does.

My original brief to our architect was to create an "attic style" upper floor, with vaulted ceilings that were as low as possible in order to minimise the height of the first floor. Although his design does not reflect the attic style I would have preferred, I believe that this is due to minimum ceiling heights stipulated by building codes. If this is incorrect and the roof line can be lowered I would be more than happy to rework the plans accordingly. We have chosen to retain the 3m high ceilings in the front two rooms of the original house as we wish to retain as much of the original character of the house as possible.

In regards to the upper storey link between the house and the existing bungalow I would like to explain our reason for requesting this feature: We are currently (temporarily) living in Canberra and have been for almost two years. During this time the planning application for 12 Mc street was processed. Due to a glitch in the mail redirection I did not receive notification of the proposed upper floor extension. If I had known about the plans I would have lodged an objection and asked that the upper floor on number 12 be set more forward as it blocks the morning sun to my backyard. As the permit had already been issued by the time I became aware of the plans I was unable to have any say on the building. Since our backyard is now significantly darker it will be very difficult to re-establish my garden when we return to Mc street next year. The first floor balcony and the walk way are our attempt to increase the amount of outdoor area that receive sunlight and will be capable of supporting plant growth. My intention is to have the walkway and the balcony lined with planter boxes so that I may continue to indulge my passion for gardening in spite of my darkened back yard.

Mr E's opinion that the extension should be built in "a more contemporary modern design" and that the the design should "be handled more respectfully and cleverly" is nothing more than opinion. When we were looking for an architect to design our extension and oversee the construction we approached Mr E for a quote. We subsequently decided not to engage Mr E as we found his fees to be inflated well above the other three quotes we obtained and we do not like his style of designs.
As I have stated, we do not want a modern looking first floor, we want the addition to look as authentically Victorian as possible. The differences between our and Mr E's aesthetic appreciation is personal opinion and has no place in a town planning objection.

I purchased the house at 14 Mc Street in 1993 and it has been my home since then. As soon as the renovation/extension are complete my family and I will be returning to the house and intend to live there permanently. I have always enjoyed the community atmosphere of Mc street and have established firm friendships with my neighbours. I am determined to maintain my good relationship with my neighbours and will do my utmost to accommodate any reasonable objections to the proposed extension.
It saddens me that Mr and Mrs G and Mr E, relative new comers to Mc Street, are willing to jeopardise the existing good will by criticising our choice of style rather than making constructive comments.
I look forward to hearing the council's decision on the planning application.
Larissa Read more!

This is the life.

My mother's day.
The husband got up to look after the little kid and and I slept until 9:30am - bliss! Breakfast was smoked salmon, poached eggs and hollandaise sauce on toast. Gorgeous. I was presented with 4 DVDs (Repo the genetic opera, Elvis 1968 comeback special, Elvis best of and Blacula) a CD (PJ Harvey's new one) and a card the girl had made. Around midday the girl and I went to a "Mother's Day Picnic" that the Blandberra council puts on. It was advertised as a "free event".

We queued for 30 min so the girl could ride a pony, they required a $3 donation.

She was on the pony for all of 30 seconds - a very quick walk around in a circle - I calculated that to be an earner of about $360 per hour per pony. When she was getting off I said to the girl leading the ponies "the girth strap is dragging on the ground, the pony almost stepped on it", she ignored me. I said "EXCUSE ME! the girth strap is dragging on the ground, the pony almost stepped on it". She looked at me as if I was speaking swahili. I said "LOOK!" I pointed at the strap and said "IT'S DRAGGING ON THE GROUND. PONY WILL STEP ON IT. CHILD WILL FALL OFF. LAWSUIT!" The girl made a vauge grunting noise and went about fixing the strap. Honestly, I don't know why I bother.
We then queued for another 30 minutes so I could spend $4 on a bag of fairy floss for the girl. While she shovelled the spun sugar into her gob and smeared it in her hair I wandered about the market stalls that were selling kids clothing and toys. As we passed the information stand I stopped to fill out their feedback survey - when asked "what would you like to see at the Mother's Day Picnic next year?" I wrote "something for mothers". I also wrote that events advertised as "free" should actually be free. There was not a single ride that didn't ask (demand) for a donation. We boogied to a cover band playing Kylie Minogue songs for a bit then headed for the car.

At home that evening I sat and watched Blacula and drank wine while the husband did the dinner/bath/bed routine with the child then cooked my dinner.
Over a gorgeous marinara pescatore I thought to myself - best mother's day EVER!!! Life is good.. Read more!

When Mum is a Goth...

Our letterbox is overflowing with catalogues advertising pink fluffy dressing gowns, lilac bra and undies, floral teapots and perfumes with names like “Pretty”. But what is a child to do when her Mum is a Goth?

Here’s my list of Mother’s Day presents I would love:

1. Sleep. This is the universal requirement of all mothers. There can never be too much.
2. Black fabric dye. Keep those blacks blacker.
3. Bvlgari Black perfume. Smokey and sexy. Not a hint of floral or musk.
4. Rimmel 60 second black nail polish – I go through a lot of it.
5. Goat’s milk soap – it’s smooth and silky and doesn’t dry your skin.
6. Baby shampoo – the world’s best eye make-up remover (heavily diluted).
7. Lindt dark chilli chocolate.
8. Black ugg boots – for indoor use ONLY! My purple ones are wearing out.
9. Domain Chandon Cuvee Riche – gorgeous and much better than Moet.
10. Belgian waffles with rich vanilla ice cream and strawberries.

11. And some of these...spider web cup cake covers....very, very cool.

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Where are youuuu?

The girl loves Scooby doo. I don't, never did. I do find it slightly amusing that the girl enjoys a cartoon older than me more than she enjoys the modern stuff - but did she have to pick such a lame one as her favourite? Anyway, today we had the honour of seeing this drivel performed live on stage.
The whole day and events leading up to it have been an ordeal, to say the least. When the ads for this garbage first appeared on telly the girl put considerable effort into making sure I saw one of the ads so I knew how to buy tickets. You were supposed to register so you could be sent notice when tickets went on sale. We registered, and then waited. She harangued me about it daily for months. Eventually, at a kitchen ware sales party one of the Mums mentioned that tickets were on sale. So much for this preregistering rubbish! I rushed home, fired up the computer and the credit card, and bought two tickets. Sorted. We had good seats and the girl was ecstatic. There were two shows in Blandberra, both on a Tuesday. Oh well, lucky my boss is very forgiving with this sort of child related stuff. Anyway, it was a couple of months away so I had plenty of time to work it out.
A few weeks ago I was sitting at work and got a text from one of the Mums asking "how was the show?" I thought, "what is she on about, she must have texted the wrong person", replied to her as much then forgot about it. Later, driving home from work, I realised the Scooby Doo show had been that morning. I freaked. I had fucked up big time. I was so upset I felt nauseous. I rushed home without collecting the girl from child care and went to the computer. No additional shows had been scheduled; it wasn't playing in Blandberra again. There was no redemption. I imagined her little face crumpling and the tears and the shattering disappointment I would have to deal with when I told her about my memory lapse. The husband stopped me and said "don't tell her yet, work something out". I was stumped as to how to redeem myself from this. The next show was in Wollongong, a three hour drive from here. I was reminded of my friend’s email that I posted a few weeks ago and her lament "Do I drive to Wollongong in my pyjamas?" At least I would be dressed.
So I hired a car, a sat nav thingy and at 8:40am this morning we set off for Wollongong - I had followed the husband’s advice and told the girl there had been "a change of plans". No fault admitted.
We stopped at Goulburn for a Mc Wee, much to Ms Satnav's dismay please return to the highlighted route, and a coffee and I was relieved to read "All McCafe coffee beans are sourced from Rainforest Alliance Certified TM farms". Oh, I feel so much better now about buying from a multinational, resource decimating, landfill generating, purveyor of coronary-artery-disease-in-a-bag conglomerate instead of supporting local business. Sad reality: it's on the highway and their coffee isn't that bad. The child had a small hissy fit because she couldn't get a happy meal at 9:30am, and I had the frothiest flat white ever. I once worked for McChuck’s rival and was reprimanded for not putting enough ice in the drinks - I was "giving away" beverage - and I figured the coffee was subject to the same padding.

Anyway, thanks to Ms Satnav's clear instructions we pulled up at the WIN Entertainment Centre with half an hour to spare. Once inside we headed to the merchandising stand and I baulked at the outrageous prices (e.g. $20 for a screen print calico bag) then queued up with all the other chumps to spend $50 on a crappy soft toy.

The play (as I may have mentioned) was horrid. A shortage of actors had them playing multiple characters and characters disappeared for no apparent reason and their absence was never explained. I had to constantly remind myself the target audience was average age 5 and I should stop expecting Shakespear. I did smile at one point when Shaggy and Velma and Daphne did a dance to the music of "Two ladies” from Cabaret (Fred was missing). But my mirth was dampened at half time when I paid $4.50 for a drumstick.

The play was scheduled to end at 1:45pm and I pre-warned the girl that we needed to run as soon as it was over so we could get back to Blandberra before the hire car place closed at 5. She was a good girl and we were on the road by 2:10.

The drive through the mountains and the combination of popcorn and icecream had her looking quite green and we stopped briefly for her to get some fresh air.

At 4:45pm at a petrol station around the corner from the hire car place, I sent the girl across the road to the public toilets. I usually would never consider such a thing, road crossing and public toilets unaccompanied, but we had such little time to spare I made an exception. She was ultra careful crossing the road, but couldn't get into the toilet. A kind woman tried to help the poor abandoned child until I eventually paid for the petrol and sprinted (wobbled) across to rescue the girl. One of the toilets was "out of order" and the other was occupied. I did the math and got the girl to wee on the grass. We raced back to the car and arrived at the hire place at 4:56pm. The girl packed up the stuff from the car (she even remembered to get the CD out of the stereo) while I went in and did the paperwork. Then we went to the bar across the road and waited for the husband to collect us.

Over a glass of red wine my stress levels started to dissipate. I reflected on how good the girl had been, how helpful and compliant (except at Maccas) she was and that I was glad I had put in the effort to right my wrong.

Was it worth it?


I think so.

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